Jesus of Nazareth (7-2 BCE—26-36 CE), also known as Lord Jesus Christ, Jesus H. Christ, Issa, and Jeebus is a mythical character that is the central figure of Christianity. He is based on characteristics of earlier gods of the Mediterranean area, most notably Mithras. According to mainstream Christian mythology, Jesus is the son of God and God simultaneously, making God his own father. Mainstream Christians also hold that Jesus was crucified by the Romans. Christians believe Jesus rose from the dead some time later, making him a Jewish zombie, therefore meaning mainstream Christians believe God is a cosmic Jewish zombie who is his own father.

His mother[]

His mother is normally said to have been the Virgin Mary who, somewhat surprisingly, is held by some versions of Christianity to have been a virgin before, during, and after his birth. The Virgin Mary is evidence that Abstinence is not always effective. The father of Jesus was God, that's in no way original as many divine and heroic figures of ancient mythology had a god for a father and a human mother. [1]

His male role model was, according to the Bible, a craftsman or learned man called Joseph (you gotta check those translations!).


Jesus is often depicted as a kindly man who taught forgiveness, redemption, and being kind to the poor. If only conservative Christians today had similar views to their most important prophet. Some sections of the New Testament suggest Jesus approved of peace, other passages suggest Jesus was warlike. See for yourself, Is Jesus peaceful?


Jesus is also an important prophet in Islam, being the last one before a 700-year hiatus and the arrival of the prophet Muhammed.


Jesus was a dark skinned Jewish Arab. There are plenty of nice white Protestant Christians look down on people with that skin color. They wouldn't want anyone as dark as Jesus in their churches. However, some pastors and Christians have said that Jesus wasn't what is depicted in paintings and art. By no means all Christians are prejudiced against dark skinned people. Despite this for white people Christianity is part of the white western memeplex. They may recognize consciously that Jesus was as dark skinned as Arabs from that region are today. Their art regularly depicts Jesus, the disciples and the people round him as white. They like to think of Jesus that way and push the reality to the backs of their minds. There is racism in American Christianity [2] though the better Christians oppose racism and say racism is Unchristian.

Black Christians sometimes show Jesus with Sub-Saharan features which is slightly less implausible because of totally unproved suggestions that the father of Jesus may have been a Roman soldier called Pantera. A minority of Roman soldiers were Sub Saharan but if Pantera was from Sidon he was probably Arabic.

Who crucified Jesus?[]

The Romans crucified Jesus but anti-Semitic Christians prefer to blame the Jews, of which Jesus incidentally was one. Presumably this is because European Christians are genetically closer to Romans than to Jews and they prefer to blame outsiders. Not all Christians are prejudiced in this way. [3]

There is a good and a a bad side to Christianity, see the category page


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